ink_splotch: (between this breath & the next [shelter])
One of the things I love about going for an ultrasound is the other people. All of whom stare at you as if you've just wandered in from the street wearing next-to-nothing, on your way from one man to another. Without fail. It's hilarious.

Also in the hilarity column, I was watching Ice Blues in the livingroom while doing dishes with Bean. Housemate C wondered in, and watch a couple of the action scenes with us, and was like: wow, guns, knifes, hand-to-hand combat, this has everything!

Bean and I: *do not say "And gay sex!"*

C: You probably like it for the right reasons, like character development and plot and interactions.

Bean and I: *giggle madly and do not say "And gay sex!"*

Good times, man.

So, what else is new? The SU is threatening to cut me off if I don't send them documents which I've already sent. Twice. I'm not sure what's going on there, but I figure call them Thursday and sort this out. They're nice people right? I mean. For a Danish government agency.

My dissertation presentation is next Thursday; it currently has a powerpoint and will possibly actually have a speech to go with it by Thursday. It's just that I still don't actually know what I'm doing. There's part of me that's very (very) tempted to go full on cultural studies and just talk about the representation of the struggle for a working family model in my texts, but that seems too easy and also more like I'm doing a sociology degree than an English degree - not that I'm not tempted at this point. Particularly because I've been reading a lot of Stephanie Coontz, who makes family theory seem fun and useful, and compounds her damage by also being really useful in relation to my dissertation.

My dissertation is, at the moment, for those following this saga, currently titled: Real and Imagined Communities in Coming of Age Literature. Which is a pretentious way of saying: Families, real and created. It is actually quite interesting - I'm certainly more excited about this than I've been about any title for a while, but it just all seems like so much stress, you know? Like, I've been doing this for six months now, how is it not done?

Oh, life, why so crazy?

I'm off to dance around to the Scissor Sisters some more. Because I wouldn't want to be productive or anything.
ink_splotch: (& the wide world waiting [shelter])
Making lists in surprisingly therapeutic. Like making plans. I'm faintly afraid that when I get to January 13th, I'll be turning in plans and lists, rather than an actual coherent dissertation.

(I suppose I could argue post-modernism. "Lists and plans, you see, give an impression of the whole - an idea of meaning that a full essay would not add anything to. If you look at Derrida, I think you'll find I have a point. I'm sure it's somewhere in there.")

Also, the Bean is moving into my house, due to various minor catastrophes. This is rather exciting, and slightly unreal.
ink_splotch: (josie long is odd & adorable [britcom])
Among my notes for my essay on Catcher in the Rye, I've written (hopefully, this will illustrate that Marie is actually doing something useful with her life and not just indulging herself \o/), which is special in itself, but then a little further down, there's note saying Mormon underwear kink, who knew?

I really shouldn't do notes while watching films, I feel. Particularly not films with gay sex. Hee!

Also, I have booked open days for Warwick and Newcastle, which is a step in the right direction re: making decisions about the future (Newcastle, iiih!) and have been listening to hymns on my iPod while cocooned in Gemma's room reading Emma. This is making me feel very warm and safe and like maybe my life is still a little bit awesome, even if it is also a big confusing mess.

Also, Far From Heaven is on TV. Mmm, hot chocolate, Gemma and Julianne Moore.

But there will still be dancing tomorrow night. And haircuts with Bean on Wednesday.
ink_splotch: (No need to dream [otp])
Assorted notes:

1. Bean was in Denmark this week! It was very awesome - I got to show off Copenhagen, which is always fun. I kind of love my city a lot, and I kind of love Becca a lot, so it worked out well.

2. I'm Your Man - this vid is simply excellent; music, clips and the overall theme work perfectly and the whole thing just looks seamless. Plus it celebrates crossdressing and awesome women. What more could you want? (Well, the entire series of Star Trek: Voyager, but you can't get everything in this world)

3. Why is it inspiration always strikes repeatedly at the same time? I am in the middle of three writing projects, now is not the time to write RPS or Hot Fuzz fic, seriously brain.

3a. Simon Pegg is, like, ridiculously pretty. Why did no one tell me this? Also, why did no one tell me how awesome Hot Fuzz is? I cannot be expected to find out these things on my own!

4. I have spent way too much time thinking about hips lately. I blame not being near Gemma. And also Bruce Springsteen a little bit.

4a. Also, why am I ridiculously horny when Gemma is nowhere near? FAIL, body. FAIL.

5. I totally went to the beach today. SUMMER!
ink_splotch: (searching for my own peace [freedom])
1. Exams are done! DONE! No more medieval literature ever, no more restoration, DONE.

1a. Sir Thomas More > everything. sort of.

2. Tonight I am going pretty myself up, put on a dress and take my girlfriend out for steak and wine. Freedom!

2a. And tomorrow, Bean and I are going to get our hair cut short and girly. Yay! This time tomorrow I may even have a fringe. Which I haven't had in two years. That should be exciting!

3. Currently barreling my way through Olli and Christian's story on youtube. Because if Hollyoaks insists on giving Kieron and John Paul another month long break, I need to get my kicks elsewhere (SEND HELP! SEND HELP NOW! THIS SOAP OPERA THING CANNOT POSSIBLY BE HEALTHY) Also This is ridiculously hot and the playlist feature on Youtube is pure, distracting evil.

3a. Oh, German, how are you so silly?

4. Michael Chabon, you guys! He's all pretentious and wordy and I'm kind of madly, madly in love with The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay, but particularly Sam, who's all kinds of messed up and repressed and doesn't recognize all the conflicting impulses he has and I just. HEART. It's just so, so good and I'm only 200 pages in.

5. Did I mention the FREEDOM?
ink_splotch: (we rule the school [coming-of-age])
Because I am a genius person, I almost dragged my bed down into the cellar today. I'd been told that the delivery date for my new bed (OMG YAY, new bed soon!) was tomorrow - however, a quick inspection of my email revealed that, actually, my bed isn't arriving until the 4th of June. Hurrah for double checking! (Albeit after I actually stripped my bed and cleaned my room in preparation for the new bed. So smart.)

Speaking of general genius, today was my first exam. It went as these things tend to - I felt like I could have written a lot more than I did, much more coherently than I did, but I feel like the problem is more the format of the exam, than my own performance. Yes, I suppose I could have done more work, but on the other hand, I knew what I was talking about, and I knew how to get it across. Just not in the time alloted to me. So it goes, and I've resigned myself to the possibility of getting a 2.2 for the course. I'm still hoping for a 2.1, but I can accept a 2.2.

The important thing is that now I can forget all about the Restoration period, and instead turn my mind towards my twin loves of Renaissance history and Sir Thomas More. And possibly also to medieval literature and the madness of Margery Kempe, which is proving rather more entertaining than it probably should be.

As if to reward me for surviving my exams, two rather wonderful pieces of fic appeared today on [ profile] jpkieron; clearly someone somewhere loves me, because this is a fandom with notoriously bad writing in it. Blather about the fandom and glee about the source )

Unrelated to anything: I haven't been able to get We Rule the School out of my head for days now. I'm not sure what it is about it particularly that moves me so much, but I can't stop humming it over and over. In general, I'm obsessing over Belle and Sebastian - have been for the past three months, but it's flared up again quite dramatically during my revision and now the song is stuck in my head.

Some notes upon the watching of Eurovision )

Life, you guys. Life.
ink_splotch: (grabbing what happiness we can [happy])
1. So, yesterday I may have shrieked 'IN A CONFESSIONAL' loud enough for everyone in my house to hear me.

But, really - talk about ticking ALL my boxes. The confessional scene! The awkward no-we're-not-having-a-personal-conversation-in-public conversation! "I've never wanted anything so much"! Also, hello Kieron's collarbone! And hi, the kiss at the end? BOYS! GAH!

(I'm totally ignoring the first conversation they have, because it's silly. Very silly.)

2. Yesterday I went out, got drunk and had fake lesbian interaction with my Bean and K from our course. T'was awesome and needs to be repeated. (Have I mentioned that I love my coursemates? And that Bean and I are possibly the weirdest people in the world? In a good way. And that I HAVE NO SHAME? It's not good. Except for the part where it is.)

3. Exams? What exams? *whistles*

3a. Essays? What essays?
ink_splotch: (we touch when we want to [love])
Real Life:
Last night, I sat around with some of the coolest people I know and discussed politics, Disney, the state of the world, the beauty of maths, literature and the importance of stories, childcare, feminism and university lecturers. Then I went dancing and managed to be a complete dork on the dancefloor with my girlfriend and my best friend. All in honour of Gem's birthday.

It was awesome. It made me feel very much the proper student.

Also making me feel like a proper student is the fact that I still haven't written my essay, due in a week, and instead of writing it today, I am going over to Mike's with my housemates to watch Mulan.

I love my life, you guys.

Political Life:

Open Source Boob Project - because having random strangers touch my breasts is an empowering experience. Right.

Everything I want to say has pretty much been said, but just. Ugh.

Fandom Life:

I don't follow the storyline any more, but this kiss?

Ridiculously hot. I mean. *fans self*
ink_splotch: (we're gonna have it all [friends])
Fab things:

1. My room is clean. Or at least tidy. Tidier. Okay, so my room no longer looks like a library threw up over it. Books in organized piles, FTW!

2. I have finished my critical theory essay! Which is to say, I've written 2000 words. Now, to the edit-mobile!

3. Doctor Who! Oods! )

4. M*A*S*H marathons on TV. Hi Trapper ILU. Still. The more I watch the first three seasons, the more the whole "Trapper-is-a-bastard" thing in fandom mystifies me. Trapper's lovely. ♥

5. Yesterday, in my house, we had E's brother and sister, T's sister, Mike and his housemate and Gemma. It was a lot like I imagine having a large ethnic family would be like. Except with a truly disgusting sense of humor.

It was brilliant.



1. Satire and Sensibility essay still stalling at 200 words and still made of fail.

1a. S&S is due in a week before CT. Oops?

2. Morte D'Arthur, presentation on. For Wednesday. I hope my tutor doesn't mind it being all about the War of the Roses and not at all about the book. Because the book sucks.

3. I have to go to work tomorrow. Which sucks. I've applied for jobs elsewhere, but no word yet. I just. I'm so bored and I don't even have nice co-workers to make up for it.

Also, the pay is lousy. Boo.

However, I am going to go and do my presentation now (possibly while watching M*A*S*H) and all shall be well with the world.

Also, did I mention? Becca's back in town! ♥!
ink_splotch: (i love paris in the summer [cities])
I'm back! Though not from outer space. Rather, from Bean's and from Paris. Both of which were amazing. Firstly, Bean's home is in this tiny village in the country - no, really, the country, rolling fields and village greens and everything. It's the type of place where, when you look out of the window, you half expect some lost Romantic poet to be rambling, perhaps stopping every once in a while to harass some part of nature with a poem. Absolutely beautiful, if at times a little scarily sweet. It's pretty much exactly as a non-English person would visualize England (and, for that matter, the English). I even went to church on Sunday, and that was fun and sweet as well. Of course, afterwards we went to have fondue and sit in a hot tub for the day, so it wasn't that weird. And it was awesome to see Becs again, even if she has now again deserted me for the great country of France.

Speaking of France - Paris! The trip was amazing, absolutely amazing; the only real problem was it was too short, so we didn't get to visit Pere Lechaise, for example, or the Bastille and the Opera. But Paris is such a gorgeous city, and being there with Gemma was just - it's what Paris is supposed to be, you know? Wandering through small streets and ducking into the small parks scattered throughout Paris, walking arm-in-arm by the Seine, sitting in the sun in the park at Notre Dame kissing and eating meringue. It was lovely, and I think we had quite a well-rounded trip, hitting all the big landmarks, but also managing to go down the small streets, eat in some "local" restaurants and visit some local coffee shops and bars (one in particular was awesome - it was underground! The drinks came with marshmallows! I was pleased.), and, of course, visiting Shakespeare and Company which was as beautiful and glorious and just lovely as you'd expect. It was an experience. )

The only thing that really kind of bugged me was Notre Dame - it's such a stunning building, but it loses a lot by having "walk-in" confessionals, a gift shop, neon lighting and hundreds of tourists snapping pictures. Den of thieves, anyone? Also, there was a concert Tuesday night, which we didn't realize until Wednesday, which was annoying.

But it was so good. It really was. And I'm so glad I went.

(speaking of Gemma, she is currently asleep in my bed behind me - she's home ill with a stomach bug and feeling guilty for not being at work. I know it's bad, but I'm kind of glad; it's so nice having her here, and I'm enjoying taking care of her (she is ridiculously undemanding and makes a big deal out of everything I do, which is very rewarding. Shallow, me?). And it's quite homey having her here. Even though it's also making me feel guilty for being on LJ rather than doing work.)


I feel like I'm waiting for something. Maybe because Paris has been the big thing I've been waiting for since January and now it's gone; maybe because I've an urge to write, but no discipline to do so; maybe because essays and exams are due in soon and need studying for and yet I'm not doing that; maybe because, I keep looking for books and trying to find the perfect one - you know that feeling, where you know it's there somewhere, but because you don't know exactly what you're looking for, you just know you'll know when you see it, it's oddly...not frustrating, but expectant? I feel like that, like something is about to happen or I'm about to do something, but I don't know what.

Either that, or the combination of Perks of Being a Wallflower and Belle and Sebastian is messing with my mind.
ink_splotch: (courtship rituals of geeks [library])
No, seriously, why won't Critical Theory work? I thought I had it, but, as is becoming the theme of this stupid break, I was wrong. It's kind of stressing me out to a ridiculous amount - I so want this essay to work, to be all those things we were told it was supposed to be: original, thought-provoking, off-the-beaten-path, something that doesn't necessarily have to be a traditional text: a film, a picture, a non-fictional text. And the only idea I've come up with so far that I can make work? The Book of the Duchess. OH YES THAT'S REALLY EXCITING. I'm supposed to be smart. I'm supposed to be able to do this, and yet my mind is completely blocked. It's partially because I'm pretty much a gender/queer theorist fan at heart and I've already done an essay on those theories, so all my ideas in that direction are utterly pointless, but that really shouldn't mean that I can't think of anything for psychoanalytic criticism or post-colonial. Work, brain. Work.

Also not helpful is my brain informing me that the reactions to yesterday's episode of Hollyoaks is a really good example of interpretive communities: Craig/John Paul shippers tending towards reading the episode as a declaration that there will never be anyone except Craig, whereas John Paul/Kieron shippers read the episode as John Paul saying Kieron could be the one who helps JP get over Craig. Add to that the discussions of whether or not there's chemistry between John Paul and Kieron, which also split down shipping lines and, well. It could be an interesting essay, particularly with regards to the vehemence with which the two parties disagree - a very striking illustration of how there's no text except the one we write in our heads. Or possibly an example of shippers gone truly crazy; that's the beauty of theory, it can be both things at once!

However, since I can't write that, maybe I should get my brain to focus on something I can.

Or I could go pack, and focus on the fact that I'm going home tomorrow, which means seeing Gemma - I can't even explain, two weeks seems like it's been forever. It's going to be so good to go back; don't get me wrong, I love being in Denmark and when I'm not here, I miss my family and Copenhagen and everyone, but Leicester's home. And Gemma, I miss Gemma, I miss having her typing in the background, or reading while I read, or napping with her and just, hi I miss being part of a couple. Which might be a little sad. Though, to be fair, I also just feel more like me in England - I'm part of Gemma♥Marie, Becca-and-Marie, my house, my seminar groups, I belong in England. And I have people I belong with here, I have friends, but it's not the same. It's weird.

And now, really. Packing.
ink_splotch: (could be our everyday [home])
1. Morte D'Arthur would be infinitely more amusing to read if I were allowed to edit it as I read. There would be a lot of comments along the lines of: "Too much tell, too little show", "irrelevant to the plot", "repeating how much Gawain likes fruit eight times is just annoying" and "character development - look it up".

It is entirely possible that I am a terrible English student.

2. My dad and I have watched four hours of How I Met Your Mother today. We watched two hours yesterday. We are maybe a little bit hooked. (Also, my dad keeps going "The women! They have *hips*! When did they start allowing women with hips to be on TV?" which is very amusing. And, indeed, the women on HIMYM are really, really gorgeous. Mmmmmhmm.)

Also, the show is just awesome. And mostly angst-free! ♥

3. I've been having a huge craving for more Being Human the last couple of days. Why isn't there more? *dispairs*

4. I've managed to double book just about every day this holiday and so haven't managed to do a lot of things I should have done. Like book a time for my hair. This is becoming a bit of a crisis.

5. 10 days to Paris! 10 days until I get three completely work-free days! This should be de-stressing, except right now I'm kind of worried it won't be as awesome as I want it to be, or Gemma won't like it as much as I hope, and just, flail! And then I realize that it's three days with *Gemma*. How can it be anything but awesome?

5a. Well, it won't be awesome if I don't exchange my money. Like, before I leave Denmark, where I can do it without have to pay an exchange fee.


6. Also, am going down to Becca's in eight days. It's kind of weird - being at uni, I very rarely actually see people's, you know, former homes and meet their families and all that. I'm oddly excited about that. Also, going to church!

7. Critical theory has just become awesome again. Seriously, Freud's essay 'The Uncanny' is possibly the best thing I've read in CT this year outside of gender and queer theory (and more interesting than certain aspects of those theories, as well). I am now in the novel position of actually wanting to write my essay.

It's quite a strange feeling.


ink_splotch: (Default)

April 2009

5678 91011
19 202122232425
2627 282930  


RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags